Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Best Of: Best Kills in the Nightmare on Elm Street Series

Whorticulture.com Presents: The Best Kills in the Nightmare on Elm Street Series


Oh NOES, how I love thee.  Let me count the ways, in my new Slaughter Series.

#1: Johnny Depp

I guess you shoulda stayed awake, Johnny.  Sucked into the bed, the bed vomits a copious amount of blood.  What could be better?  There's even a special deleted scene that shows Johnny slipping back out, covered in blood.  I think they should have kept it - it's pretty creepy.

Trivia: Did you know this scene went totally awry?  The room spinner went haywire, flipping the room rightside-up and covering the crew with blood.

#2: The Birds

NOES 2: Freddy's Revenge.  Not the best in the series.  It totally strays from the formula - Freddy possesses a kid, and comes into the real world to kill.  Also, it's incredibly homoerotic.  One of the characters - the Coach - is killed when balls fly at his head, and he's towel-whipped to death in the shower.  On his bare ass.  Sigh.  Don't even get me started on the dance scene.

So why did I choose the birds?  It's the scene that always stood out to me.  It's sort of comical, in a terrible way.  And the other kills are pretty lackluster.

#3: The Vein Puppet

NOES 3: The Dream Warriors.  Killing kids in a psych hospital is like shooting fish in a barrel.  Luckily, Freddy pulls it off with some style.  Think about this for a moment: Freddy rips the veins from this kid's arm, and uses him as a marionette.  That's pretty hardcore.

I know lots of people think that the killer TV is the best kill in this movie.  I have major problems with it. 

Granted, the line "Welcome to Prime Time, bitch!" is quality, but why didn't anybody question how she got up there to slam her head into the TV?

Trivia: Did you know the line "Welcome to Prime Time, bitch!" was total ad-lib by Robert Englund?  Yet another reason he's my dream lover. 

#4: Wanna Suck Face?

NOES 4: The Dream Master.  By far my favorite of the series, basically because of this one scene.  And no, not just because I want Freddy to suck face with me.  Okay, maybe a little.  But it's great kill after great kill.

Poor little Sheila.  All she wanted to do was study.
True facts.

#5: How to Feed a Model.


NOES 5: The Dream Child.  Freddy is a real humanitarian.  Here he is, fighting anorexia.  Oh, Freddy, what will you think of next?  Anyway, I don't know what he's feeding her, but it's seriously foul.  You're gagging, she's gagging, it's a good time.

I think you might have over done it, Freddy

#6: Now You're Playing with Power

NOES 6: Freddy's Dead The Final Nightmare.  I know, I know.  The line "Now you're playing with power!" is kind of terrible.  TERRIBLY AWESOME.  Come on, he's killing a kid (Breckin Meyer) in a video game.  And, really, the other kills in this movie aren't that great.  What is great, however, is that this movie has Roseanne and Tom Arnold in it, playing two crazy inhabitants of Springwood, Ohio.
He took our babies!
And don't forget a cameo from  the star of our #1 spot, Johnny Depp!
This is your brain.
That's right, direct off the set of Edward Scissorhands, Johnny Depp returns for a 30 second spot, only to be hit in the face with a frying pan.  Damn dude, Freddy got you twice!

#7: N/A

This movie does not exist to me.  Read this to find out more.

#8: What Jason Did

Freddy vs. Jason.  I guess this kind of counts, since Jason is under Freddy's control and doing his bidding, right?  Right?  Well, whatever, it's an awesome kill.  I remember jumping pretty hard and feeling pretty uncomfortable in the theater.  HE BENT THE GUY IN HALF.  BACKWARDS.  I mean, the guy deserved it.  But come on!

And these are the ways I love NOES.  Agree?  Disagree?  Let me know!

2 comments:

  1. Great picks....one other one i enjoyed was the comic book death in NOES 5...granted it wasnt bloody or gory but still interesting to me.

    New Nightmare was bullshit from start to finish...either the deaths were just asinine or as you pointed out. rehashes from previous films in the franchise (Julie's death a la Tina?)

    Didnt realize that Johnny Depp made that cameo in NOES 6...had no clue it was him.

    Also interesting fact on Johnny Depp's gusher of blood scene, Wes Craven was standing awfully close to the electrical wires for the production equipment when the fake blood spilled out and onto the very wires he was next to.....life almost imitated art on that one.

    -wretchesnkings

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    1. I get a kick out of the fact that Alice Cooper made a cameo in "Freddy's Dead" as Freddy's dad during one of Freddy's memories during the part when Maggie gets inside his mind and she sees a teenage version of him, and he's cutting himself with the razor.

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